Thank you Jesus!! (ahem, Ben)

I have a problem that I suspect many people may have. I see excellence in everyone else, but not in anything to do with me. Logically, I know this doesn't make very much sense, but at the same time it's impossible to escape that feeling of being impressed by others and by nothing I myself do.

After watching all the gift and stuff accumulation that goes on as a result of baby adoration, I've reached the conclusion that if I had a kid I'd give them a cardboard box to play with and nothing else. Totally unfair and untrue, I know. I bet a lot of people think some variant of this at some point. :-P

Unlike nearly every one of my brothers or sisters, I still have no allergies (as far as I know). What I do have, which I've just realized over the last four months, is that I have a sensitivity to some kind of metal. I am soooo cool now. I have a very cheap watch, and if I wear it for just a day or so, where it rests gets all bumpy and itchy and red. At first I thought I had poison ivy or something. But! This explains why for some types of earrings my piercing holes burst into red, hot, itchy flames. I love realizing what has actually been going on.

You know how there are some views of "humanity" as being kind of idealistic, where there is a Love for you, and people can really be good, and then there's another sort of opposite view where everyone is bad and thinks bad thoughts and mentally is never faithful even if they are by their actions? I guess it's just idealism versus cynicism, and I find myself flip flopping between the two sort of polarized views a lot. Because I want to think of people and love as that wonderful ideal, but then reason gets in teh way and I end up thinking like a cynic and that there is no Love and people will never be happy and will always be looking around at their options. How do people balance these views and end up at some sort of moderation that isn't miserable?

I saw The Golden Compass tonight. I'll talk about that later. :-P

Ben formatted my computer, and now it is so much healthier and zippier, it's fantastic. Ben is sort of like Jesus (heresy! I love it!). He wipes your hard drive clean of your slovenly computer habits, and gives you a fresh start.

Happy Birthday, Brad!!

Conveniently, there was already the title left over from last year, so I didn't even have to type the whole thing. Suhweet.

To the illustrious personage known as Bradford Daniel, my brother:

You are only 36 years old now! You spry young thing.

Many happy returns. :)

I bet you want to know what hte first favorite is. Haha, I bet you all know, actually.

Well, this Christmas has been....interesting so far. I had a pretty rare emotional breakdown for about a solid hour where I practically couldn't look at anyone and not cry from feeling so bad about not having presents for people. I didn't get all of my knitting done, and I'd really like it all to be done together and not just give some people a present and not other people, so anyone who was going to have a present knit for them, sorry. You'll be getting it in...a while. Meanwhile, maybe I should start collecting people's addresses so I can ship things.

So, yes, I will be knitting at a relaxed pace, and if it happens to be July when you get that winter knit hat in the mail, then too bad. Merry Christmas in July!!

Anne and I had a fun little party last night. We were expecting maybe twenty people tops to come, and instead somewhere in the range of...forty+ came. Tons of people we hadn't seen in years, and it was cool seeing how some people had changed and others had stayed the same.

This is really boring so far. Well, Anne and Brad have left. Which means that I will have blogging time once more. My glasses should be ready tomorrow (woot!) and ...I'm going to Cheesecake for dinner tonight with Andy.

I'm going to make a Christmas by Photos blog entry, but there will be nothing new that isn't already in my Facebook. In fact, captions might even be repeated. Sorry, chaps. I will actually be feeding Jennie's Facebook laziness.

I have a badass Ortlieb bag now! Suhweet. Not to mention the Perfect Sessions of Cowboy Bebop, cute pjs (Jennie and Anne), and my first proper baseball cap. Oh, and Ben and Julie got me the cool thermometer I asked for from thinkgeek.com where you put it up on your window and it tells you digitally the current temperature and highest and lowest temperature so far. Handy!! But it only goes to -13F.

I just coughed and sneezed at hte same time. that was insane. For those of you who know how I sneeze, that's just downright dangerous.

Well, time for my second favorite part of the day. Showering!!

Regarding bathroom stalls. I understand why someone might pick the middle stall when there are only three. Some people might pick the first stall because it's the closest. Other people are sanity nuts and might think that they'll pick hte last stall, because most likely fewer people have used it, so it must be cleaner. And then there's the real sanitary nut who thinks that most people go in hte first stall, and other people go into the last stall in an attempt to be clean, which leaves the middle stall the least frequently used, and therefore the cleanest! So maybe this is why some people pick the middle stall. After going through this thought process, I have stopped being mad at people who pick the middle stall. I understand why you might be doing it. Peace, love, and happiness, brothers.

Seeing excellence in others and none whatsoever in yourself is a problem that plagues me and I suspect many other people. Maybe not many many, but definitely some. I know that I'm a worthwhile person and not stupid and such, but I still can't help looking at others and going, "Wow," and seeing nothing to say wow about in myself.

Got glasses yesterday!! Well, bought them. Ready in 3-5 days. I was surprised to see that my prescription actually hasn't gotten any worse.

Time to go downstairs and see if I can swing a trip to visit Sam in London. Sweet!!!

I will be taking photos, I promise. You just might not see them. So much knitting to do!

Christmas Quotes

Brad and Anne arrived today, and Ben and Jaime came over for dinner. So there was Ben K, Julie, Ben I, Jaime, Anne, Brad, Barry, and Ann, plus Moira and Evie.

Quotes flew from the walls.

Anne:

Oh my god, are you a conservative?

from out of the blue during a discussion of presidential candidates:
Did you guys hear about Britney Spears' little sister???

Jaime:
her helpful suggestion about why there were so many special needs things in Antigonish:
Maybe it's because they're inbred.

I have ovaries of steel, basically.

Me:
"...and I'm like Switzerland."

"I'm on a search for spirituality.... I am; it's just not going very well."

"You know your family's weird when you say, 'Do you see me?' and they think you're being existential."

Apology

In my defense, I did write in my last blog entry that I was taking the 7am bus to Dartmouth. I suppose I didn't, though, explain that I was spending two days in Halifax before flying out. I'll have a couple of fun photos from that in a bit. Or....maybe now. Actually, not now. I have to go peel potatoes for the sausage corn chowder we're having for dinner tonight.

Brad and Anne are arriving in one hour!

My hairspray exploded all over the inside of my bag. Luckily it was in a pocket with dirty laundry so not everything was hit.

Ella is very big, and Julie is very pregnant. Barry and Anne (Julie's parents) are here from Ireland. They arrived about four hours before me yesterday.

Oh yes, I'm in Ohio, btw. Just got in last night. So happy to be here and up in my old room, the attic.

Really have to go peel those potatoes.

Don't worry, Anne, I didn't emerge from my Canadian (or Halifaxian, really) adventure married.

Nick, Nolan, and I made an ice cream cake. This is us (really them) smashing up graham crackers and oatmeal cookies into tiny bits to make teh crust. It was delicious.

taking the 7am outta here

If I had Christmas presents but no Christmas tree, I would agree that the only logical move would be to throw out the presents. No tree, no presents.

I'm finished with my exams!!!! That last one didn't go very well. I mispredicted what one of the essays would be on, so I had nothing but BS to say for 25% of the exam. Whoops! Anyways, tonight Thérèse and I are getting girlie drinks and snacks and watching a movie like National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation or something at her place.

Now that my exams are finished, I really need to start knitting like nuts. I have so much to do, and rushing when you're trying to teach yourself something new (such as a wrap and turn, simple I know, but I've never done it) could go veeeery badly. So I hope you guys are all excited for Christmas presents that you'll never use. Except for Jaime. Who may take hers out when she's feeling glum for a laugh.

So, I bought my bus ticket down to Halifax today. I felt so cool and badass walking up to the Information Desk and saying, "I'd like a one way ticket to Dartmouth, please." Getting to in person ask for a one way ticket to anywhere is just cool. "So I bought a one way ticket to Santa Fe, and she never saw me again." See? Cool.

I'm trying to figure out how I can fit all of my clothes as well as all of my yarn into my little suitcase. It's a three dimensional Tetris. Or that game Rush Hour. You can play this online! Cool.

Well, I am actually going to pack up my computer a day early. I'm taking the 7am bus out, and I'm spending tonight at Thérèse's, so it'd be nice to have one less thing to worry about doing in the morning. So, send me no urgent emails, write me no offline instant messages. 'Cause I won't be checking!

exploding pop, la vie en rose, and potential D&D

Today, my friends, was a sad sad day. You know those little annoying ads on the bottom of MSN Messenger? Well, some celebrity thing used a word that I didn't know. I was so horrified that it took thirty seconds and no more to be sitting at dictionary.com reading the definition. Lothario: a man who obsessively seduces and deceives women.

A pop exploded and ruined one of the only photos Anne and I have of our trip to Italy. Doc took it the day we arrived, as we paused on the trip to ....Sorrento? and we were both very sleep deprived and jet lagged and greasy. Anyways, I feel horrible about it, because it stripped the pigment right off. I had also printed off a photo of Julie, Ann, Barry, and me when we were taking a walk when Ella was just a puppy, and that got hit as well. I just happened to have scanned all of these, which I suppose is lucky, though also sad, because this quality sucks.


So, you know how I've always stopped just short of crossing over that line from being just a fan of the fantasy genre to full blown all-out fantasy nerd? Well, I may be about to cross that line. Theron, a friend from first year who I haven't really been hanging out with since then, messaged me the other day to tell me that he was starting up a D&D group, and wondered if I'd be interested in joining. Some of your jaws have dropped in horror, I know. Particularly Brad's. But for those of you whose jaws have not dropped in horror, I figure you just don't know what D&D is maybe? D&D (Dungeons and Dragons) is a role playing game (RPG) in which you create a character that exists within a world created by the Dungeon Master in which you battle monsters and thereby develop your character. D&D is considered sort of the original RPG, and for those of you who know things like World of Warcraft (among many others) those are MMORPGs (massive multiplayer online role-playing games). If I did do this, the only other level to which I could drop would be to start playing Magic, but don't worry I never will cause I don't want to spend all my money on those stupid cards (sorry to all of you Magic players out there).

However, I have to admit my true nature. I am a fantasy geek, and I would probably get a total and complete kick out of this, especially since the group seems like a really good group of guys. So, I'm just considering this. I haven't decided yet. Theron (who would be Dungeon Master) dropped off the Player's Handbook today to let me look over it and decide. Honestly, this would be a Mandy Adventure, because I think that teh only thing that's holding me back is my fear of looking stupid making some rookie move.

It's been snowing so constantly the last two weeks that, if this were rain, I'd be really depressed.

So I decided to not look at any of the reviews for The Golden Compass, despite my nearly overwhelming curiosity to see if it looked like it'd actually be good. And I succeeded. Until!!! I went to see La Vie en Rose at the Third Eye Film Festival that hosts cool movies throughout the year for those who are feeling culturally deprived in Antigonish, when after I mentioned The Golden Compass to my friend Sarah, she said that she heard a critic saying it was pretty crap. Nooooo!!

I still haven't looked, but now my expectations are in the toilet, and I'm so sad.

On a better, though not happier note, I saw La Vie en Rose (released as La Môme in France), and wow. Firstly, I was very very depressed. Secondly, I normally don't mind lots of flash forwards and flash backs. I can handle it. But with this, her appearance (Édith Piaf's) kept changing so drastically for the better and for the worse that I couldn't really tell if the flash forwards were in chronological order, or if we were skipping around randomly in her later years. But! Marion Cotillard was really impressive playing Édith Piaf. I mean really. I watched clips of Édith Piaf performing afterwards, and her mannerisms were spot on. She really seemed to succeed in faithfully recreating a person. I'm terrible at explaining things. La Vie en Rose is about hte life of Édith Piaf, who was a famous French singer known for (among many many others) La Vie En Rose and Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien.

I suppooose I should go study some Brain and Behavior before my exam tomorrow....

I can't wait to be back in Ohio. Soon!!

this took all of two minutes.

Feast your eyes, my friends, on this creeptasticness. You too could date this scary serial killer.

I just finished The Exorcist. Time to go watch Grizzly Man and study (but probably not) some Brain and Behavior.

Oh, and here is part of an entry that I wrote but never finished. The Unpublished Memoir:

It's a Saturday night (actually Sunday morning), and I'm lazing about my room. So that means I will write a blog entry! I have just wasted my evening (I mean spent very well) listening to NPR, sewing a button, and eating SmartPop, which is I am not kidding twenty times more delicious than regular microwave popcorn with all that greasy butter that clings to your mouth. YUCK!!!!

I was talking to Brad and reminded myself that I saw The Great Escape. I knew the generally idea, but I really didn't know anything about the ending. Based on the title, I thought it would be a pretty successful endeavor, since apparently the escape was great. But noooooooo, the whole movie is all lighthearted and happy happy happy happy happy then Bam! DEATH! What happened to the happiness? I don't know. But I'm happy that I've now seen Steve McQueen.

so...exhausted...I can't actually write a proper blog entry.

I would like ot point out that I actually like the whales. I just don't care enough to be proactive. And somehow signing a petition doesn't seem proactive to me.

Things are about to get interesting

because the internet on my computer (or in my building?) isn't working. Suckiness. Maaaajor suckiness. I woke up and saw that I had seven emails before the internet went kaput, but I couldn't check them! Anyways, I'm in the computer lab.

Whoa. Some guy behind me is on the computer, and I just heard that all too familiar voice say "You've got mail!" How long has it been since anyone's heard that? Besides watching the movie You've Got Mail, 'cause that just doesn't count. But really, all of a sudden I'm taken back to sitting in front of the computer at the farm, AOL open, watching it dial, listening carefully to the staticky clicks as it connects to see if it would be successful...weird.

Anyways, in ten minutes(ish) I'm going to go write my stats exam. In my defense, Anne, I did very well in regular stats. I hope your stats exam went well (I'm sure it did). But, back to the point. I didn't study for this at all, and I have reaaaaally screwed myself over. I hope I pass. I wonder if I will...maybe not. Yikes.

Oh, and in other Anne news. In my dream last night, Anne, I met you in a library and we were both so happy to see each other we got kind of loud. Some smartass on the other side of the rooom said really loudly, "Wouldn't it be nice if people were actually quiet in libraries?!" And you spun around, glared at him, and said, "Wouldn't it be nice if people who cared went to the specifically designated quiet sections??" And then he said something about showing common courtesy. Which made us both really mad, and in retaliation we toook out The Complete Works of Shakespeare, picked one of the most insulting lines (it turned out to be from a play that I'd never heard of, but appparently you'd studied it), underlined that section, and I doon't remember how, but we were going to somehow give the book to him. I was worried that he wouldn't get the insult.

Anyways, time to go horribly bomb this exam. Yesterday, when I ought to have been studying, I instead was in my underwear lying on top of my wool blanket going, "Wow, wool...." I did that for about four hours, watching the snow falling outside.

Oh, and today was a very Thomas Kinkade morning. A very beautiful sunrise, the houses all covered in snow, smoke rising from the chimneys, and fog burning off the water in the distance. Beautiful. Too bad Kinkade's a gross sell-out.

another thing I want

Dear Santa,

I want a dust buster. My dorm room gets little dust crud on the floor, and I don't like brooms. So it's gross. But word on the street is that little powerful dust busters can really be quite handy, and it seems ideal for the dorm room world. And maybe the small, one room apartment world. Who knows.

Merry Christmas,

Mandy (both naughty and nice--moderation in all things)

guess what day today is

So, I'm signing this petition for Jaime (not for the whales, of course), and in that comment section it was so hard to resist putting, "Didn't Star Trek teach you anything?" I'm going to get a lot of Greenpeace spam now, aren't I. Yes.

...wow, they just want you to keep signing petition after petition. I bet if I said yes to every one I could sit here all night, being linked to one after the other. I did it for you, Jaime. I did it for you.

So, I took someone's Christmas present out for a test run today...it went pretty well. And it was all my own design, no pattern. BHAHA!

I talked about Mirrormask already, right? I really liked it, because for the first time there was soemthing I could point to and say, "That's what my dreams look like. While I sleep. Most nights." Granted, there are normal and mundane nights sometimes. This has made me really want to watch it again.So, I haven't been posting very much. Which might seem odd, since classes have been out since...I had my last one last Thursday, and shouldn't that just free me up for tons of posting? I don't know how it happened, but mysteriously I feel almost frantically busy right now compared to my lackadaisical regular class schedule. Anyways, so I've been posting less. I feel downright bad about my lack of posting, actually.

Anne, you would really like my History and Theory of Psychology class, as well as their exams. I did all this studying for it so I could talk about the Sophists, Skeptics, Cynics, Epicureans, Stoics, Neoplatonists, Scholastics, and others, and why there were the shifts from one to another and such, but I get in and the first question is, "Socrates is thought to have said that 'the unexamined life is not worth living.' Discuss." Clearly, my studying helped me out here so much.

Happy release of Golden Compass day!! I hope it doesn't suck. I hate that its been hyped. I'm really tempted to look at the reviews, but I think I should resist. Ooooh, but I want to so badly.