I have a problem that I suspect many people may have. I see excellence in everyone else, but not in anything to do with me. Logically, I know this doesn't make very much sense, but at the same time it's impossible to escape that feeling of being impressed by others and by nothing I myself do.
After watching all the gift and stuff accumulation that goes on as a result of baby adoration, I've reached the conclusion that if I had a kid I'd give them a cardboard box to play with and nothing else. Totally unfair and untrue, I know. I bet a lot of people think some variant of this at some point. :-P
Unlike nearly every one of my brothers or sisters, I still have no allergies (as far as I know). What I do have, which I've just realized over the last four months, is that I have a sensitivity to some kind of metal. I am soooo cool now. I have a very cheap watch, and if I wear it for just a day or so, where it rests gets all bumpy and itchy and red. At first I thought I had poison ivy or something. But! This explains why for some types of earrings my piercing holes burst into red, hot, itchy flames. I love realizing what has actually been going on.
You know how there are some views of "humanity" as being kind of idealistic, where there is a Love for you, and people can really be good, and then there's another sort of opposite view where everyone is bad and thinks bad thoughts and mentally is never faithful even if they are by their actions? I guess it's just idealism versus cynicism, and I find myself flip flopping between the two sort of polarized views a lot. Because I want to think of people and love as that wonderful ideal, but then reason gets in teh way and I end up thinking like a cynic and that there is no Love and people will never be happy and will always be looking around at their options. How do people balance these views and end up at some sort of moderation that isn't miserable?
I saw The Golden Compass tonight. I'll talk about that later. :-P
Ben formatted my computer, and now it is so much healthier and zippier, it's fantastic. Ben is sort of like Jesus (heresy! I love it!). He wipes your hard drive clean of your slovenly computer habits, and gives you a fresh start.
